podcasts

With tongue firmly in cheek, I would like to warn everyone to beware the Knitpicks podcast. I suspect Kelley Petkun of slipping in some very persuasive subliminal messages.

I used some birthday cash to buy myself an iPod and subscribed to a few knitting podcasts, starting with Knitpicks. After a few episodes of "Once upon a time, there was a knitter who loved books," I found myself making an extensive list of must-haves for my knitting library. Then I subscribed to audible.com so I could read while I knit, just like Kelley does. After all the talk about the development of The Catalogue, I had to open a Knitpicks account so I could see this wonder for myself (it still hasn't arrived). This morning my transformation to Bot-hood became complete as I submitted my first Knitpicks order: circular needles, of course. Kelley loves her circs. I ordered the nickel-plated Options set and a 2.00 mm to give magic loop another try at Kelley's urging. My trusty DPNs are glaring at me from across the room.

As a quasi-semi-independent thinker I am a little uncomfortable about this behaviour. I do not know who this Kelley person is, except that she has a whole lot of stuff she wants to sell me, and I am baffled as to why I am obeying her every command.

While I'm on the subject of podcasts, though, I thought I'd give my impressions of those I've listened to so far. Except for Knitpicks, I have only listened to one episode of each podcast, so feel free to take my comments with the proverbial grain of salt.

Knitpicks, of course, appears to have become my early favourite. I even went back and listened to all the back issues. Kelley speaks in this extremely careful, slow, almost hypnotic voice with occasional forays into rather forced enthusiasm. Perhaps the hypnotic tone is behind her ability to make me buy stuff from her. The show is obviously scripted, though she tries to make it sound spontaneous, but as a control freak I am quite happy with the lack of meandering. Most programs have a technical segment at the front, usually covering a basic skill in a long description that I cannot imagine anyone being able to follow. Then there's a book segment, always opening with the quote above, and then a chat about what's on Kelley's needles. Occasionally, though, the show is dedicated to an interview with a knitting celebrity. Overall it's a nice balance and an freakish exercise in mind control. Four stars.

OK, now for Lime and Violet. I will not make a final judgment having only listened to one episode, but thus far my stodgy middle-aged brain cannot comprehend their popularity. They shriek, they giggle, they snort, they tell long stories in junior-high verbiage, and they rarely manage to bring the subject around to knitting. Now, I am not and have never been a person who delights in Girl Talk so perhaps this just ain't my cuppa tea. One and a half stars.

Remember the university professor who could never remember what his lecture was supposed to be about? He goes off on so many tangents that the lesson runs long and he never does get to his point. This is the guy in Stitch Stud and His Bride. Dude's a rambler, and he keeps jostling his microphone. The control freak in me bristles. I have already unsubscribed because, jeez, he didn't even force me to buy anything. Two stars.

Cast On with Brenda Dayne appears to have been the prototype for the Knitpicks show. Cast On has been around longer, but when I listened to it I could have mistaken Brenda for Kelley. Like Knitpicks, Cast On has a set format, a slow, hypnotic speaker and strong knitting content. I like it. I could do without the musical segments, but the music was pleasant enough to knit by. Three and a half stars.

Lion Brand has a brand-new podcast called YarnCraft, and heaven help me if they start forcing me to buy from them too. The host describes herself as a new knitter, which I admit did put me off at the start (call me a snot, but I'd rather listen to someone who knows at least as much about knitting as I do). I take this to mean that the show will assume more of an interview format as the host doesn't seem to have much to tell us at this point. This episode featured a chat with an LB marketing person. They emphasize that the content will encompass all crafts that can use yarn. I'll give it a few more episodes before I make up my mind but it sounded largely advertorial. Oddly, more so than the subversive Knitpicks podcast, in which the advertising must be subliminal. Two and a half stars.

Knitgrrl claims to be a call-in show, but how in hell do you call in to a podcast? I'm sitting on my deck days after the thing was recorded. I'd hazard a guess that they're no longer reachable. I don't remember much of the episode I heard except that it featured an interview with the founder of crochetme.com, and that I had some trouble hearing her. It was inoffensive but sadly it did no damage to my credit card either. Two stars.